Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Israel's 'Where's Waldo'

It's been a long time since I've thought about that old little game called "Where's Waldo". You know the one. Where you have to find the goofy-looking kid in the red and white striped sweater and stocking cap in the crowd of similar looking goofy-looking people.

Well, believe it or not, the upcoming (?) Annapolis non-event made me think of Where's Waldo. However, it's not Waldo I'm looking for. I've been looking through the papers; all the pictures; all the photo-ops; for a hint of what used to be known as the Labor Party. The Labor Party goes by many names these days. My favorite is "Kadima-Lite", however I think you'll find the most popular response to the question of, "Where is the Labor Party?" is a quizzical look reminiscent of a dog in front of an electric fan, followed by a mumbling of, "Labor Party? We still have a Labor Party?"

Shas and its marionette du jour, Eli Yishai (where does he hide all those strings?) is up front and vocal (when Eli Yishai speaks, as good as Ovadia Yosef is - I can still sometimes see ol' Ovadia's mouth move) that he is soundly against any peace that doesn't bring more money to their yeshivas to keep their constituency in the dark.

And Avigdor "Don't Call Me Yvette" Lieberman can be heard screaming from the rooftops against anything that might be slightly construed as democracy or equality.

Even Bibi can be seen patiently waiting, audibly chuckling in the corner. With a guy like Bibi, patience can be heard.

Barak and the Labor Party? I'm beginning to think Barak's brain was actually housed in that mole he had removed. Barak has changed colors so often he's got chameleons scratching their heads wondering what the hell he's doing. He out Zeligs Woody Allen's Zelig.

There was a time we knew what the Labor Party was all about. I was never a big follower of Labor, but I liked to know they were there. They could be termed a peace party. They were moderate to left. Not as far left as Meretz, but left enough to let you know what they stood for. The Labor of our memory would have dropped out of this government long ago. The Labor of our memory would never have stood by while the ruling party plays them like a cheap perfume (yes...I just LOVE mixed metaphors). The Labor of our memory would know who the hell their leader is!

River City is in trouble, my friends (that's a "Music Man" reference for those of you who are Broadway Musical challenged). And there's nothing any one can do about it except sit around, wait, and sometimes write about it.

I miss the Labor Party. I wonder what they would have done if they were still around.

Submitted by Charley